Updates man. More and more updates. So. Me and Jon broke up. Hope he's happy cuz.. well I am. Or I wasn't but I am now. See.. Me and Bobby talked. :0) and.. I found out, that, he has liked me since the day he met me. :0D And, I really like him. He's sweet and caring and I just see him as the guy that I can be myself around and he won't care or hurt me. Things are going really well with us. He's really nice and really cute :0). I mean, yeah, I really miss Jon. But I have to deal with it. And I think I finally am getting over it a little more everyday. And it feels good. The thing that pissed me off about Jon was that he would get mad at me for the stupidest things. And we were usually always fighting unless I was over his house or it was a day or 2 after we saw each other. Other then that he would bitch about me talking to guys and "flirting" with them. That's how I am. I flirt. Doesn't mean I'm interested. Because I'm not. But it's just how I talk to boys. And he couldn't deal with that. So too bad. We ended up fighting. And I think we are better.. but I'm not too sure. I will have to talk to him a little more. I'm trying to waist some time cuzz MySpace is being stupid. I have to go in like.. 7 minutes so I'm gunna stop writing and check MySpace once more. Hopefully its done being gay.

*_x3.Siobhan

mood: loved music: Rooney.

One month today. And I'm more in love then ever. He is my everything and then some. Everyday I wake up to his voice. I sleep with his sweatshirt everynight. I always dream about him. I always think about him. Even if we aren't together, he is on my mind. Times apart aren't as great as times together, but he is still with me, so it kind of evens out. I feel lost if I upset him or get him mad. I would do anything for him to make him happy. I want to wake up with him next to me. I want to be able to hear about his day at work. I want to be the one he sees and drops his bags and runs to, just to hold when he comes home from the Marines. I want to be the one he tells his war stories to. I want to hear his war stories so much that I memorized them word for word. I want to be his Ali, and he can be my Noah, and there will never be a Lon to get in the way. I want to find the perfect house with him. I want to argue over baby names with him. I want him to know when I'm having a bad day, and know the exact things to do to change it. I want to be the one he loves forever. I want him to be the one I bring home to meet my parents. I want him to be my everything and more. I want to walk down the aisle in my $800 gown with my vail covering my face, and have him remove it and smile with tears in his eyes. I want to be the one he calls when he only has 5 minutes to talk. I want to be the one he runs to when everyone else has turned their back on him. I want to be able to look in his eyes and hear him say "I love you" without moving his mouth. I want to see him everyday when he comes home exhausted and still has enough strength to walk over to me and hold me and kiss me and tell me this is the life he has dreamed of. I want to sit on the porch with him and watch the sunset, as another perfect day slowly ends to start another perfect night. I want to see all his wishes and dreams come true threw out his life time. I don't want to feel what it is like to fall in love with someone else. I want to be with him for as long as I possibly can. I want to be the reason he smiles when he is having a bad day. I want to fight him for our wedding song. I want to look for the perfect place for our wedding to be. I don't want to plan our lives together, I just want it to happen as it comes. I want to be in love with him until I have no more love to give. I love you so much Jon. You're my everything and more. *_x3

mood: weird music: My MP3 Player

Okay, so. I haven't wrote in a little while. Here's the update. Me and Jon have been together for almost a month! pretty excited actually. He means a lot to me. We have been threw a lot already, but we've made it threw all the shit and we are still runnin strong. My mum didn't really like him at first.. She did, but she thought he was too old for me.. That didn't stop us. She now likes him and lets me go over his house now and shit. Ray has been there for me threw all of this, and at the same time been helping Jon out with everything too. He just has been really chill about everything. So yeah. I went to Jon's house the other day.. Wednesday. We watched a West Side Story for a little while. Then we listened to some music. And we just layed in his bed for a while. WE DIDN'T DO ANYTHING! So don't think that way. He wants me to go over Saturday too! :0)

Hmm, on another note.. my father and I are getting along really well lately. I went over for the weekend. From Sunday till Tuesday. It was nice. And we were talking a little. And he said that if I ever wanted to move in, I was welcome. In a way, I think I want to once Jon leaves for the marines. But then again, my mum is here. And I don't think I could feel right leaving her. But I don't know yet. I still have a year to think about it all. More like 11 months, but same thing. So yeah. Jon is going to the Marines. His shipout date is a day after our one year. And fuck yes I think we will last til then, maybe even longer. He came to fireworks with me at my aunt's house in Webster. That was nice. But Saturday was nicer I think. We watched the Southbridge fireworks on the roof of his suburban. It was fun. When I was walking over to him from the shuttle, I ran into Erica and Caitlyn first.. Talked to them for a little while. Then I saw MELYNDA AND STEPH T! I was sooo excited!! I miss Mel soo much. I don't really know Steph that much. But she seems chill. Oh man was I happy to see Melynda Fife!! :0D. Then I had to go cuzz I had like, 30-45 minutes to see Jon b4 the fireworks. Then I was ALMOST there. And I saw Charlene! So me and Charlene talked for like, 10 minutes. Then I went over to Jon's car. Sat with him for a little while. Then after the fireworks, I hadta go find Devon and the shuttle bus thing. We waited for atleast an hour till we could get on the bus. There was only one bus for us. Which sucked!! but still. Whatever. I didn't get home until midnight. We had a stop to Wendy's before Devon dropped me off at home. Today, Devon is working.. 3-8. We are hopefully gunna go play tennis when she gets outta work. Kinda late, but it will be colder. A lot colder. awwwe well. I guess that's all. hmm.. yepp.

-Siobhan

mood: confused music: New Found Glory -- Everything I Do, I Do It For You.

So today was graduation. I suprisingly didn't cry. I'm half in tears right now though. I am listening to "Everything I do, I do it for you" by New Found Glory. And it's making me think of Jon. I dunno why. I don't know why I am calling him Jon either. Ever since I REALLY started liking him I stopped calling him Dirt.. idk. Jon just sounds more like, him. I guess he likes me too. =0) but this song. It's killing me for some reason. I mean it's not making my bawl my eyes out, just get watery.. and idk.. So as you should be able to tell, me and Ray broke up. Mainly cuzz I like Jon. Ugh. I like him a lot. And idk if anything will come of it. But that won't stop me from liking him.. I dunno if we could be together cuzz him and Ray are good friends. And that is kinda messed up.. but Ray seems cool with it.. but idk if he is just showing that cuzz he wants to make sure im happy or if its cuzz he really is ok with it.. ugh.. Jon is sick right now.. so I can't talk to him. I hope he feels better by tomorrow cuzz I really wanna see him. I guess that's all.

<3

-Siobhan.

mood: bitchy music: Marooooon 5.

Hmm, yeah. Me and Terri had it planned out that I was gunna sleep over and then we were gunna go to the Reggaeton dance at the Knights tonight. Since the boyfriends are in different states. We were gunna have a girls night. But of course, like usual. My mom has to go and ruin things. It's pissin me of really bad. I can never do anything anymore. I feel like I'm a little kid again. I get treated like one, then I whine and bitch like one. gees. And this stupid Lj is saying it is the year 2009. It's def. 2005. Or I would be turning 19 in a couple days. I wish. And I would a sophomore in college. I guess you can say I am technically a sophomore already. Since the seniors are gone. But whatever. I was almost crying today. It was class day. Where we see the seniors get their awards and also the senior video. Which is always fun to watch. It was really sad though. I am gunna miss all my senior friends soo much. It's crazy. But you know. It will be worse as the years go on. I got to know a lot of the seniors pretty well this year, and now they are gone. And I know a lot of the juniors, too. And of course my sophomores. I'm gunna get to know them a lot better with 2 years left with them. And when Ray graduates, that's gunna be baddd. My birthday is in about 5 days! I can't wait! Me and Ray are gunna go get pizza that night. I have to go call Terri and tell her my mom is being a bitch, yet again. I think her mom is gunna end up getting pissed that I can never go over whenever we plan on me going over. Seriously. I have slept over how many times? twice? and once was for her birthday. Now it's mine and I can't do SHIT! Gayyyyyyy. Blah. But I still love my mom. And I always will. haha. yeah pCe.

-Siobhan

mood: pissed off music: Some fuckin gay ass mix.

Holy shit. I just fuckin wrote this loooong ass thing that took me 45 minutes to write. And dumb ass me tried to change the font, and lost all of it. FUCKING A. I don't even remember what it was about. What the fucking fuck! I'm soo rip shit now. Fuck it. I'm goin to go get ready for tennis. Fuckin bitch ass mutha. gah.

-Siobhan

<3 Fuckin piece of shit computer. *iLu